LRStrategies

Writer's Block Cause #3

2011-09-11T11:51:00.000-07:00

PERSUASION PANIC.

Legal writing is persuasive writing. The legal writer’s mission is to convince the court to take some action, such as to suppress evidence or to overturn the lower court. While attempting to persuade can be an exciting challenge, the stakes in litigation are often so high that the panic of failing to persuade far outweighs the thrill of the attempt. This is not like convincing your child to eat broccoli. This is convincing the court to take an action that could affect your client’s freedom or her life’s savings.

And with panic comes… writer’s block.

I have succeeded in managing “persuasion panic” by adhering to a simple rule: WRITE THE FACTS FIRST. Obviously subject to the duty of candor, your goal is to present the facts in such a way that the reader is left with a feeling in her gut that there is only one right result in this case, and that is the result you are seeking. Tell the reader a story and empower the reader to end the story the way you believe it should end. If the facts compel a conclusion, applying the facts to the law becomes a breeze. By that point, the law is merely icing on the cake.

When Adjectives Sour

2011-04-10T12:03:00.000-07:00

I disagree that the word “whole,” when used to indicate “entire,” should be an adjective. It creates redundancy. “That project took me a whole week” is the same as, “That project took me a week.” A week is seven days until they tell me otherwise.

The use of the word “whole” to indicate “entire” took its most famous form in the song, “A Whole New World,” from the Disney film Alladin. While I admit, “A New World” lacks the same lyrical punch, the expression “a whole new” has been distorted—at least around my parts—to the stomach-turning expression, “a whole n’other.”

“A whole n’other” appears to be the result of a tongue twist between “a whole new” and “a whole other.”

Seems to me that if we had not accepted the word “whole” as an adjective to indicate “entire,” I would be spared the nausea associated with hearing, “a whole n’other.”

Now that I think of it, I suppose I have the same concerns about the redundancy created by the adjective “entire,” but that’s a whole n’other blog post.

Writer's Block Cause #2

2011-03-27T16:22:00.000-07:00

PERFECTIONISM.

One would think the desire for perfect writing is a good thing. Unfortunately, it’s not, if it paralyzes you.

The paralysis goes something like this. I have an idea. I write a sentence. I stare at the sentence. I stare some more. I keep staring. Should I use a comma there? Should I vary the sentence structure? Should this be two sentences instead of one? Would “crimson” work better than “red?” Maybe “crimson” is too pretentious. Do most people know what “crimson” means? Let me Google it. Oh no. Seems some people think “crimson” is red with a touch of purple, while others think “crimson” is closer to orange. Maybe I should stick with “red.” And so on.

This pattern is unsustainable. It’s like a dam, blocking the creating juices from flowing. You can’t get to point B if you never let yourself get past point A. Not to mention - it’s physically exhausting.

So what’s the cure? Let it go. Just write. Keep writing. Write more. Turn off the spelling and grammar check on Word so the computer gremlins can’t highlight your errors as you move along. Don’t let yourself edit until you’ve made your point.

I’m not saying it’s easy, but it’s the only way.

Writer's Block Chronicles

2011-01-26T20:33:00.000-08:00

Having suffered far too many bouts of writer’s block, I decided it was time to examine its causes and chronicle some of the cures I’ve developed over the years. I can only speak to legal writing and to my own idiosyncrasies, but I hope this endeavor proves useful to others. Each new blog post will identify a cause and a cure.

Cause #1 - DEADLINE DREAD.

Legal writing is always on a deadline. By legal writing, I’m talking appellate briefs, summary judgment motions, motions to dismiss - all the good stuff that must impress.

I could have a million insightful arguments to make, backed by no less than two million favorable authorities, and something about a deadline instills fear and panic, which leads to the infamous writer’s block.

One would think the obvious cure is – cue mom’s nagging voice – “start early, don’t procrastinate, and you’ll make your deadline.”

If only.

Unfortunately, there’s an as yet untamed force in the universe that actually sets out to punish me for starting early. If this force could speak, here are some things it might say. “Starting early on that brief, are ya? Here’s a blizzard.” “Getting a leg up on that motion, kiddo? Too bad your alternator’s dead.” “Look at her, Miss-On-Top-Of-Things, getting it done. Better look in the basement. I hear a leaky pipe.”

So what’s a more efficacious approach? BABY STEPS. Set attainable goals in increments of time, which could be something like:

On Monday, I will read the transcript.
On Tuesday, I will outline my thoughts.
On Wednesday, I will begin the research….

I have found that with the baby step method, I stop worrying about whether I will complete the project on time. Even if the untamed force attempts to derail me, the goals I’ve set are so perfectly doable that a few hours of shoveling, a trip to the mechanic, or some quality time with the plumber won’t set me back.

This method works even with emergency motions, like the ones you need to file in the middle of trial. The baby steps might be:

At 1:00am, I will craft my argument.
At 2:00am, I will write the motion.
At 3:00am, I will stare into space wondering why I didn’t go to art school…. (Kidding.)

The baby step method also builds esteem, because at the completion of each step, I can relish in my accomplishment. And there’s nothing like esteem to fuel me to completion.

Homage to the Excel Spreadsheet

2011-01-15T11:12:00.000-08:00

After more than 15 years of practice, I only just realized the value of using an Excel spreadsheet to organize discovery responses. You see, Excel spreadsheets have these nifty tabs allowing you to create multiple sheets, one after the other. You can designate each sheet to correspond to a particular source of discovery, such as "Joe Schmoe's Answers to Interrogatories," "Mary Jane's Answers to Interrogatories," and "Joe Schmoe's Deposition Answers." When complete, you have one document with all discovery responses at your fingertips, and you can easily move from sheet to sheet for quick comparisons.

Perhaps it's sad I find this exciting. Nonetheless... YIPPEE!

When the Right Word is Wrong

2010-12-29T07:56:00.000-08:00

So, I'm reading a judicial opinion from another jurisdiction today and I stumble (literally) across the word "pretermit." First question I have is, how do I pronounce it? Pree-ter-mit? Pree-ter-mit? Pree-ter-mit? Next question I have is, what does it mean? Several seconds go by and I realize, several seconds have gone by and I haven't moved off the word. Now I ain't never been formally trained as no writer. I just picked it up in my schoolin.' But shouldn't we refrain from using words that halt the reader dead in her tracks? In fairness, pretermit does have a legal definition, when one pretermits, i.e., omits, a child from a will. Maybe I wouldn't have stumbled if the word was used in that context. Instead, it was used as follows: "Having reached a decision on the first issue that disposes of the case, we pretermit to consider defendant's other issues." Seems to me that "decline to consider" would work just as well, and be much gentler on the reader. But I digress, as I should really get back to reading the rest of the opinion.

Sweetheart

2010-08-18T20:02:00.000-07:00

Here's a link to a heartwarming story about an abandoned greyhound who is being brought back to life by an incredible group of people: http://sweetheartsstory.blogspot.com/. This tale, as sad as it began, will restore your faith in humanity. Keep on getting healthy, Sweetheart!

Apostrophe Update!

2010-08-14T07:37:00.000-07:00

In an earlier blog post (http://bit.ly/boDSeK), I ranted about the misuse of apostrophes to pluralize words. Thanks to @GRAMMARHULK on Twitter, I've learned that the phenomena is called the grocer's (or grocers' (ha!)) apostrophe. Apple's, orange's, lemon's....

Apparently, the phenomena is so pervasive, it's earned a name. Hopefully, it won't earn "accepted usage" status.

Proofreading Tip!

2010-08-04T19:01:00.000-07:00

A key to effective proofreading is to come clean with your faults.

For example, I have a habit of typing the word “reasonable” when I mean to type the word “reasonably.” I have no idea why this happens. It’s as if the connection between my brain and my hands momentarily severs and out pops an “e” instead of a “y.” Unfortunately, the error is impervious to spell-check because “reasonable” is a word, just not the word I wanted to use. “Reasonable foreseeable,” though rhythmic, is not legally sound!

Another example is typing “you” rather than “your.” This error is particularly troubling because it lends a certain Soprano-esque quality to a sentence. “You argument is specious.” Fugetaboutit!

Recently, I’ve begun compiling a list of similar errors and using the “Find” feature in Microsoft Word to sniff out potential whoopsies. Nothing substitutes for thorough proofreading (multiple times, after periods of food, water, and rest, if possible), but the “Find” method provides at least some added security against the dreaded typo.

Really?

2010-07-24T18:31:00.000-07:00

“All’s I know is….”

Every time I hear this expression, I get a headache. It’s a double-whammy of horror.

The first problem? Literally translated, it means “all is I know is,” which is just plain gobbledygook.

The bigger problem? It’s an unintended admission to knowing only one thing. “All’s I know is, that car is a beauty.” Really? Is that the only thing you know? That your neighbor’s got a pretty car?

All's I know is, if I hear it again, I might have to say something. Nicely, of course.

Exhausted

2010-07-23T18:11:00.001-07:00

The letter “x” is busy letter. While it might be used less frequently in English text than other letters, it has many other roles to fill, like marking the spot, pairing with “o” to send hugs and kisses, and serving as an alternative to the check mark. Sometimes it even pinch hits for its friend “z.” (“Xavier played a lovely xylophone.”)

With all that it does, “x” is way overbooked. It has no time to spice up coffee, nor can it waste precious moments modifying adjectives. (“Now that was an expecially good expresso!”)

Here’s hoping “x” gets some much needed rest.

To Correct and Serve

2010-07-22T17:38:00.000-07:00

In law school, I was known as the fashion police. So critical was I of others’ attire that my friends had citations printed for me with boxes to check next to offenses like, “White shoes after Labor Day.”

Years later, whether I matured or the Catholic school flashbacks intensified, my focus has shifted from faux pas in fashion to gaffes in grammar.

One particularly heinous crime? Using an apostrophe to pluralize a word. “Don’t miss the firework’s!” “Get your fresh hot dog’s here!” “Two coffee’s for the price of one!”

This offense has become so pervasive that I am tempted to patrol the streets with a red pen and edit each and every violation. Unfortunately, this behavior would constitute vandalism and two wrongs don’t make a right.

So, to carry out my duties as a public servant of the written word, I will use this blog to file periodic reports.

Off to investigate the insidious use of the letter “x.”

Over and out.